I’m home sick again today, after subjecting my co-workers yesterday to the spectacle of a full-blown coughing-and-choking fit that lasted about half an hour. I was completely incapacitated while coughing uncontrollably, gasping for air, gagging, wretching, sweating, turning purple, streaming tears, and thinking I might literally DIE. I’ve never experienced anything quite like it. It just went on and on and on.
Once I recovered sufficiently, my colleagues sent me to the clinic, where the doctor listened to my lungs, said it was just a cold, prescribed codeine cough medicine, and sent me back to the office. The office wouldn’t have me: go home, they said, get better. Take medicine, lie on the couch, sleep, watch TV. So here I am.
Speaking of TV, before I moved I always thought the reason there was never anything good on TV was because I didn’t have cable. Now I have about 750 channels, and there’s STILL never anything good on. Did you know that if you don’t change the channel you can watch What Not to Wear all day and probably all night too? They take people like me, secretly videotape them in their bedrooms getting dressed, then ambush them, publicly humiliate them, throw away all their clothes, give them $5,000, and make them shop for clothes they hate. Sometimes they look better at the end of the show, sometimes they don’t. Last week I saw an episode in which this adorable art professor, who liked to wear her jammies to work, was forced to grow up and become sophisticated before our eyes. I liked her better in her jammies.
There’s a British version of What Not to Wear too. I’ve only seen it once.The BBC fashionazis, Trinny and Susanna, used psychological terror tactics in their style interventions. Rather than just teasing and cajoling their victim into dressing differently, they actually got angry at her for her fashion choices, and yelled at her and made her cry.
Anyway, I watched What Not to Wear for hours and hours when I was home sick last Friday, and might do it again today. I have no idea why.
I think there’s a lot of nothing on TV. We put our cable back to Basic, and although there are one or two channels I’d like to add, the rest I wouldn’t care if they disappeared.
This cold is a lingerer. Continue with remedies and extra care for yourself for another week or two. I’ve been seriously hoarse on and off for 2 1/2 weeks, and it sounds as though you have it worse than me. Hope you’ll be better soon.
Since there is nothing good ever on t.v. I rent movies when I’m sick. Great movies, stupid movies, depending on how sick I am. What Not to Wear is a funny show, so one-sided, as if the only way to dress is whatever Stacey and Clinton say is cool. I watch it anyway sometimes, but agree with you, sometimes the before is better than the after.
They just never come a knockin on my door!
Wow that bug really has a hold on you. Now that you have 750 channels, try looking at the food channel. I bet that they have more than one version of chicken soup that will head you on the road to recovery. Get well soon!
I know how you feel about that show…you can just get hooked and not change channels till you hit a repeat. But really, most of them do look better after. Sorry you are still sick.